By Sarah Louise Dale
As a military spouse, I am no stranger to having to choose between one thing or another. Having a career is a real challenge in this lifestyle, so when we decided to fully homeschool our two children, it wasn’t too difficult.
But, for those not living this lifestyle, it can be a choice that pulls at the heartstrings. Growing up, I loved public school and my experiences there, and we wanted that for our children. Things have drastically changed in our educational system since the 90s.
When I was nine years old, I knew I wanted to be a teacher more than anything in the world. My path to getting my B.A. degree was a bumpy one, but I did it. All that was left was the teaching license.
The process for getting that was my introduction to how broken our education system had become. Due to things I disagreed with, (extra classes beyond the teacher pre courses) and my experiences as a substitute teacher led me to realize that not only was my dream of becoming a teacher not happening, but I didn’t want my children getting lost in a broken system.
As a military family, we are not rolling in the money and soon to retirement means we will have even less than we do now. So, the idea of having a career vs homeschooling the kids is a tough one.
I go through periods of being fine simply homeschooling my children, and then turn around and feel like I’m not contributing financially and go search for a job.
In February 2023, we decided that after watching our daughter struggle so much, and having no friends in public school, that it was the sign we needed.
My “career” would be educating our children, and anything extra I wanted to do would be just that, extra. We gave our son a choice, and despite doing overall well in school, he wanted to homeschool as well.
He saw his teacher stressed, getting ready to add to her own family, and began to feel the effects of that. You see, kids are not oblivious to things going on around them like we were in the 90s.
They see and feel so much more these days, and my kids saw the cracks forming wider and wider in the broken system. I’m at a good place right now where the guilt I have for not having a career is very low.
Below are some tips to get to where I am if you’re struggling with career vs homeschooling.
Watch your children when you are teaching. See how important your role is in their lives. You’re so much more than “just” their parent.
This was something I struggled with for a long time, and what led me to writing. I love being my kids mother and wife to my husband; but I’m more than that. But, at the end of the day…being a mother and your child’s teacher is such a rewarding role to have.
They will thrive under your leadership and teaching far more than they ever could with a teacher who is trying to balance the chaos that is the public education system.
This isn’t a negative painting of our amazing public school years, but truth spoken from even their mouths. Your children will show you that what you’re doing by being their educator is far more rewarding than a career.
You can still work and do what you love AND homeschool your children. With many work from home opportunities, you can still work without sacrificing your child’s education time.
As a writer, I’m able to do this and make sure my kids are learning every single day. We all learn independence in this and doing something you love outside of your regular “duties” shows your kids they can too!
Have a law degree? Take time off from the courtroom while homeschooling and offer services of writing wills, creating legal terms of service for websites; basically turn anything you do in your legal field into a service you can do outside the courtroom.
Have a teaching degree? Offer online tutoring services, or end of year progress letters/evaluations to other homeschool families.
Have a medical degree? Offer zoom appointments/tele-health services. Your career doesn’t have to take a back burner just because you need/want to be there for your children.
Homeschooling doesn’t take all day. Contrary to what a lot of people think, your homeschool days do not have to be seven hours long like public school.
The freedom within homeschooling is wonderful in that you set your own schedule.
We do maybe two hours of book learning a day, and the rest in implemented into every day learning; a trip to the grocery store for math, baking in the kitchen for math, library hours (this is when I write) for reading, writing letters to loved ones for handwriting/grammar.
Homeschooling is what YOU make it. If your career is important to you, then find the balance and do it.
Wanting a career and wanting to homeschool your children shouldn’t be an either/or situation. Breaking out of the mold that society has imprinted on us over the last few centuries isn’t easy, and it’ll take a lot of work…but it’s doable.
You should never feel guilty for wanting both a career and a big part of your child’s education. There’s room for both.
Sacrifices will need to be made, like maybe you don’t go into an office and mingle with coworkers after work, but they are minimal in comparison to the alternative.
I hope this article has helped you see that finding the balance is all you need to be happy in your decisions. It’s important to remember that your child’s first teacher, is you.
We’re made to believe that sending them to public school when they turn five is the be all and end all; but it’s not. Homeschooling is a big world; it’s how you choose to place yourself in it that really matters.
By Sarah Louise Dale
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